i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
