Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Randomize