btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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