i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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