How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
