Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Barsexuality is the new black.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
They took my balls.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Randomize
