You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
