Ambien. No doubt about it.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
