I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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