i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
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