Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
