the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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