Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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