How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
