Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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