Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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