Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
