need another drink. this is the easiest way
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
