Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He felt like a one man threesome
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
