thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize