He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize