The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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