He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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