i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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