You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
