I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
