Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
