those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize