I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
