Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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