I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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