I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
