So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
