I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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