her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
