You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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