Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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