I am midnight drunk by noon
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize