hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
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