There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
