As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You can't just leave with hair like that
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
