I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize