He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
