sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
