Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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