Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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