it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
