My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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