Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
