Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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