so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
